Monday, October 21, 2013

Back to work

I'm in my office. It was still dark when I left the house, raining miserably, children both asleep. I have been awake since 3.30am, Martina woke for her feed and took one hour and fifteen minutes to get her back to sleep. Meanwhile, Oliver also woke and paid us a visit. He had not had enough to eat at dinner (ahh the muffins at 5pm weren't a great idea) and so was hungry. Mike looked after him and relocated to his bedroom at about 5.30. I was still awake though feeling the sleepiness slowly taking over...about 30 minutes before the alarm was due to go off. And then I was up. And everyone still asleep. It's hard thinking I'm not there and Martina will definitely have woken up by now and no morning cuddle with mamma.
I know many of my American friends and working moms would have gone back months ago, I didn't find it this hard with Oliver, but Martina is so much younger.
I will be home by 4pm. Not long.

5 comments:

  1. I feel your pain. I am in America (Northern CA) and with my first child...I was so fortunate to stay home for 9 months with him and then back to work only part time (30 hours a weeK)...I worked for a very good tech company with good benefits, and very liberal (by American standards) maternity policy. I was also able to save up my sabbatical (my co. gave 8 weeks paid sabbatical every 7 years of service) so I was paid most of that 9 months. Going back to work was tough...but my son was already crawling, eating table food, sleeping through the night and had just self weaned from nursing.
    Fast forward 2+ years later. My division was sold off to another company and their policies were not liberal...I had to go back to work full time or lose my benefits while I was still pregnant....and then had to return to work just 16 weeks after my daughter was born (it would have been 12...but I had enough vacation time saved up to get that extra four weeks). She was not sleeping through the night, still nursing and was a sickly child already suffereing from ear infections. It was sooo awful. I remember being so very tired, and every night during the week just seemed like a rushed blur. My husband pretty much took over the care of our 2 yr old son while I continued with a very needy 4 month old baby and also tried to keep my house up and laundry somewhat done. It is all such a blur now...I feel like I missed so much. but luckily we managed to get into a bit of a routine and our daycare (creche) was very close to my office so I would go get some lunchtime cuddles when I could. My baibes are now 5 and 3 and we have a pretty good routine....the early days were tough...but we all survived. I will be thinking of you as you find your new groove.....I do hope the nanny works out well and Martina starts giving you more sleep in the night.
    kd

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    1. Kd, I want to let you know how much your comments are useful and reassuring. I would love to email you but I can't find a link in your profile, so I hope you read this. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

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    2. Fran....you can reach me anytime at krduchien@gmail.com. Just read your update on your first week.....so happy to hear Martina is getting more sleep and eating well and your first week went smoothly. I am now going through a new phase where my husband travels more so I am doing a lot of the parenting on my own....WOW....a whole new ballgame. But we are managing. Parenthood...it is a constantly changing animal but oh so worth it.
      Karaleen

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  2. Going back to work is always SO hard. I hope the day goes by fast for you and you get to go home and cuddle with your babies (and get some sleep)!

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  3. HUGS my friend!! That sounds stressful and hard! I hope it gets a little easier!

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Thank you so much for stopping by, your comments warm my heart!