Blasts on board!

Thank you so much for all your good wishes and messages, I do believe the positive vibes have arrived to Dublin from all over the World!

Last night while meditating I did this visualisation exercise that spreads positive energy from your inner self to the last corner on Earth. I imagined this energy travelling down the road to the clinic, really connecting with the embryos in the incubator. I thought about the embryos as mine really for the first time this cycle, I felt them.

This morning I was hopeful we would not get a phone call, I repeated some positive affirmation upon waking up and then off we went to the clinic for our scan. I am not sure what happened, there were so many people n the waiting room, like standing up and all, and we were waiting for ages (normally I never wait more than 5 minutes). Also Mike recognised a neighbour from his home town!! What are the chances! Anyway, the exchanged the usual "how are you keeping? you well?" like they were in a pub or something...I hope they know we won't say anything, we are quite open about IF but of course many people are very private about it.

Anyway, at 9.50 as Ivy as suggested on Sunday, I sent Mike downstairs to see if we would be long as our transfer was at 12.30. I also told him to see if he could get to talk to Ivy and get some news on the embryos and whether the transfer was going ahead. So he did, we wouldn't be waiting that much longer and the transfer was confirmed!! At that point I could have been there the whole day!

Scan went well, it was the Favourite Doctor that did it for me, only a tiny bit of fluid and she wasn't concerned. She new everything about the embryos she said she was checking with the lab every day!! How sweet can she be? She said everyone in the clinic knows us so well and they all can't wait to celebrate our pregnancy in the right spot! Awwhhhh...

We hopped in to work, I faked a UTI and off we were again to the clinic.

We had two nice fully formed blastocysts and wait...two more morulas! The embryologist said they'll culture them until tomorrow and see if they make it to blasts, if so they'll freeze them. The last time it didn't happen but still, our five little heroes are fighters.

I had the Top Doctor for the transfer this time, I never had him before so maybe that was the one I needed between my legs! Who knows. Anyway, he went over all the past transfers, he noted that the first transfer was done 5.5cm deep in the uterus, and it ended up ectopic. Than I had the two FET at 4 cm deep and one was a biochemical. But listen to this, the last transfer was done again at 5.5cm despite me warning the doctor about the previous ectopic, and sure enough...it was ectopic again!!! I could have got into a rage at finding this out, but I opted to let go and be calm for the new two blast-babies. The Top Doctor did the transfer between 4 and 4.5cm then asked me to lye down for a while and to take it very easy for a few days.

One negative omen: they gave me a pregnancy test!!! Noooooooooo I didn't want it!! But we took it (it seemed rude not to) an we put it away. My official test day is the 20th of February and I'm suppose to go in for another intralipid infusion on the 17th. I'd say I'll know if I'm pregnant before then.

So here I am, on bed rest for a couple of days blogging and working and waiting for the computer tech to give me a call before I throw the New Toy out the window myself!

Day 8 scan and a bonus intralipid! UPDATE

Yesterday it kind of came to my mind that this cycle there was no mention of the intralipid infusion. I decided to call the clinic because according to my schedule if it's going to happen it should be on day 8! And sure enough...I was told that yes I had to have it done, millions apologies for the oversight and please come in early so that I can get out in time for my first lecture.

The great thing is that now the intralipid it's done at the clinic. You may remember my ordeal with the intralipid at the prvious cycle, so I definitely was not looking forward to it.

This morning I went in prepared with patches everywhere with the anesthetic gel, but first things first.

The scan was very good, confirmed 14 follicles, 8 on the left and 6 on the right between 17 and 10, we hope that the smallest ones will pick up. My E2 on day 6 was very good, in fact better than the last time at 2,560 and my lining is now at 8.5 mm which is also a little better than the last time. I am pleased with the fact that this time, on the same dose of Puregon (150U per day) I'm actually doing better number-wise. Again, as of today things should go ahead as scheduled with ER next wednesday.

I was then brought down to the theatre for the intralipid. My Favourite Doctor came down to put the cannula in. I warned her that I'm not a great veins holder, but she took a look at my harm, she asked the nurse for a smaller needle (they do exist!!) and I felt absolutely nothing. She was in within seconds, took the blood for the E2 check and there I was with the drip going.

What a dream. Honestly. I am so grateful i can do it there, a part from the fact that it's two minutes from home, they actually know what they are doing!

I have to go ahead with the injections as I've done so far, same dose. I have already stopped the aspirin and hopefully I'll trigger on Monday!! Woohooo! I'm very happy.

On a sad note, I overheard one of the doctors talking to one of the embryologists saying something like "The patient from yesterday, the one who only had two eggs and none fertilised, must be called by a doctor not the lab..." Gosh...whoever she is...I am thinking of her.

--------------------------------------------------

Update:

Ullallahh I got a call from the Favourite Doctor, I have to reduce the Puregon from 150U to 100U as my E2 is increasing steadily and has reached 5000! She said it's perfectly safe but they don't want me to hyperstymulate. She said she can practically confirmed that ER will be on wednesday. On monday they will recheck E2, but I should be on the safe side of the upper limit. Let's hope so, as I don't want to trigger with decapeptyl!!

Intralipid and progesterone

This morning I went into town to get my intralipid infusion. I realise I never really explained what it is for so here it goes another little science lesson! (taken from the info material I got from the clinic by the way)

"Evidence from both animal and human studies suggest that intralipid adminstered intravenously may enhance implantation and help mantain pregnancy. Intralipid is a 20% intravenous fat emulsion used routinely as a source of fat and calories for patient requiring intravenous nutrition. It is composed of 10% soybean oil, 1.2% egg yolk phospholipids, 2.25% glycerine and water. Intralipid stimulate the immune system to remove "danger signals" that can lead to pregnancy loss. The appeal for intralipid lies in the fact that it is relatively inexpensive and is not a blood product. Its likely benefit to IVF patients with immunologic disfunction is still under evaluation".

So basically, given that I had some borderline values in my preliminary immune-profile they recommend I take it anyway as the full treatment (2 dose at day 8 of the cycle, one in the 2ww and one at some point if I get a BFP) is cheaper than very expensive blood tests which are done in only 3 labs in the World (!!) and that would confirm if I really need it or not. The same ordeal of the needles repeated itself, I just couldn't believe it that despite the promises of having various size needles for this time around, despite me reminding the coorinator when she phone last tuesday to move my appointment a day earlier, despite the fact that the words "relatively inexpensive" really means it costs a good bit and it ain't covered, I still had to be tortured. Because that was it. Three bursted veins later the doctor only put in half the cannula to get around the problem and it worked. I actually suggested it like the worst junky on Hearth...I had to explain I had been a paramedic for 6 years and I had a few tricks of my own. I am going to complain though, if they don't have the right equipment I shouldn't pay full price for the treatment. Another worry on my mind was about the progesterone I'm taking this time around. A girl on the local forum, on the same vaginal gel (Crin.one 8%) but no oestrogen tablets, started bleeding way before the testing day and that shook me no end. I went checking all my meds and discovered that one dose of Crin.one gives you 90 mg of progesterone (I take two a day). On my last cycles I was on progesterone pessaries which gave you 400 mg per dose (and I had two a day of those also). My very first cycle, to the pessaries I was adding PIO once a day (50 mg of progesterone but as injections). I never, thankfully started bleeding earlier than the test day even when it was a BFN. But you know, I'm no RE of course, but these numbers don't make sense! I did a bit of reading and it does seem that the formulation of Crin.one is way better than the pessaries and that you do absorb the same amount even though you are on a lower dose. Because I'm at home at the moment I don't have access to the scientific journals i could see if I were in work so my mind was racing. I called the clinic and they said there has not been a single case where switching to Crin.one had made a difference, so basically, IF progesterone works for you and stops your period even if you are in fact not pregnant be reassured that Crin.one will do the same job. And so I decided to believe and my wait to the test day continues...

No snow babies for us

Our three little fighters didn't actually make to to the freezer unfortunately.

The blast that had started to cavitate but didn't seem to be doing to well yesterday didn't progress, the other two compacting morulas have compacted today but the embryologist felt that the process was too slow to be good (day 6 you definitely should have blasts) so she didn't think freezing them was a good idea. I actually agree. Beside, two FETs didn't work for me, whether it is the preparation therapy that doesn't agree with my body or just bad luck, I rather have a fresh cycle.

Having said that, all my energies are with these two on board and again the embryologist said that they were "very good-looking blasts" above the rest of the group anyway, so fingers crossed!

I have been in bed-couch-bed most of the day, so I feel I'm giving this cycle the best chance ever! Tomorrow I'm going in for the intralipid IV which I'll visualise as food for the embryos! Doing quite a lot of relaxation and listening to post-transfer CD. No symptom spotting as it would do my head in!

Two blastocysts are with mommy!

Wow...a few little miracles happened today. First of all, your messages kept me calm, they really did and I'll never be able to thank you enough for them.

The second miracle was that when we got to the clinic, after one and half our of reiki and acupuncture together (totally recommend it!), added on top of relaxation techinques all through the morning, I was the most peaceful and relaxed person they have ever seen...

The third miracle was when we talked to the embryologist. We actually had questions written down for her so she knew she was in for a long chat (and my bladder wasn't full enough enyway!). Both Mike and I are scientist and Mike is a molecular biologyst so I mean...we just don't want the dummed down version of what's going on, we need a scientific detailed explanation and if you have papers to back you up we'd love to read them! And she was lovely, she totally engaged in the conversation and gave us every little detail we were asking for.
So here it goes my little science lecture for the day!

She rechecked my E2 value and confirmed that 9 eggs out of 13 follicles is exactly as expected and that it correlated well with the 5642 on monday last. She said a value of 500-1000 is what indicates a mature egg (I had lower values, but maybe these are different units?).
7 mature eggs was perfect out of 9 total and the fertilisation was also very good with 6 out of 7 looking good on day 1.
On day 2 all the 6 embryos had 4 cells. At this stage they get put into a different culture broth to help them developing further.
On day 3 we had 3x8 cells, 3x7 cells and 1x5 cells. They were all doing well with only one having minor signs of fragmentation.
On day 4 (yesterday report), we had 3 morulas, one compacted, one 20% compacted and one 30% compacted (early stage morula), one 7 cell and one 8 cell didn't divide, the 5 cells grew to 6 cell. Again here they get a new batch of growing medium which is richer an should help the step from morula to blast.
Today, day 5 our two early morulas were beautiful blasts with nice cavitation showing (where the embryo is going to form), the compacted morula was also a blast but the cavitation was not as pronounced and it's under observation until tomorrow. Remember the 6 cell embryo? It became a compacted morula today!! Liked the new food apparently! And so did the 8 cell arrested embryo! Another compacted morula! The 7 cell didn't budge. So amazingly, we may have something to freeze tomorrow, in a cycle where we would have been happy to have something to transfer today! She'll phone us tomorrow in any case to let us know.

The transfer in itself was easy and the doctor was the same as I had for the ER, so now he's my absolute favourite one! He was very nice and encouraging which is nice to hear.
Testing day will be on the 9th of August (Mike's comment was "oh, the day of the All Ireland semi-final!" he's a big hurling fan, a traditional irish game...) and I don't have any tests at home because I'm determined not to test ealry! I'll be taking a few days off work this time.
I'm going to go in for my second intralipid on thursday morning instead of friday, but apparently it's no problem. So here I am, in my 2ww for the fourth time! Praying for my dream to become real.

First intralipid infusion done!

I didn't manage to update last night on my intralipid infusion. Well, it's no big deal...ONCE THEY MANAGE TO FIND A VEIN THAT WOULD HOLD THE NEEDLE!! Oh my God...this clinic had only one type of cannula which was too big for my veins.

After two attempts which resulted in two collapsed veins and me nearly passing out, they got the superdoctor in and the ordeal was over. He was great actually!

I have to do it again in two weeks and they promised they are going to have smaller needles for me. The drip was only 250mL but took over 90 minutes to be done, thankfully I brought a book with me and I didn't get too bored.

Also no call this time from the fertility clinic, so everything is well and I'll follow the plan.

Second scan: cheked!

Day 8 scan this morning and things are looking good! My lining is up to 8.3 mm with nice triple pattern, follicles on the right side are up a bit (8/9) measuring nicely between 13.3 mm and 11 mm. No newbie on the left, still 7 growing nicely (4 around 13 mm and 4 abit smaller). Dr. L (my absolute favourite!) was very pleased and once again, unless the blood comes back with some suprise this afternoon I have to stay on my medications as planned. Monday is the day of the final scan and EC still on track for the following wednesday or thursday at the latest.
I checked again with Dr. L to make sure that I'll be triggering with pregnyl and not decapeptyl and she confermed that there's nothing that is indicating possible change of plan. Delighted with it.

Feeling very well, of course I have some twinges in the belly, but overall I am better than the last time. I'm going to my acu/reiki/holistic massage appointment today and really looking forward to it. Then, in the afternoon I'm getting this intralipid infusion for good measure!

My little sister is going to NY for 6 weeks leaving tomorrow, lucky chick! Seriously considering the possibility of a long weekend over there too!! But can't plan anything now of course.
I'll try and update this evening with news on the infusion!

Go follies go!!

Day 6 scan today and although I was quite nervous (too many?? to few??) it was just right. I have 6 follicles on the right side and 6/7 on the left. They are all nice sizes between 10mm and 7mm. So I am responding well, like the last time but a bit more controlled. Last time on the same day I had a few more follies and a little bit bigger, I was on a higher dose of Pur.egon too.
Good news on the lining front too. Already trilaminar pattern and increased to 5.3mm. The nurse was very happy and so was I!

She took my blood for E2 check but she doesn't expect any surprise and I have been given the green light to start my Orgalu.tran tomorrow (unless of course blood says otherwise). I'll be back on friday (Day 8).

I had a very nice chat with this nurse, I was quite puzzled by the fact that the doctor had suggested intralipid infusion just as a precaution given my ANA borderline and the nurse last week said I didn't need it. Well, it turns out I will get the infusion and it has to happen this friday!! Just as well I asked for clarifications.

I am also happy to report that my enthusiasm is back on track, all going according to plan I'm only a week away from EC!

----------------------------------
Update

the clinic called!! Would you believe it, I lost three years when I saw the caller ID on the screen....they never call if things are going well (and I complained about it after my failed FET the last time). Well, it was just to say my E2 level were great (1269 so very safe and just go on as planned) and that yes the doctor confirmed I should have the intralipid infusion done on friday!