I slept very little and ate even less over the weekend, worrying sick about the week ahead and the what ifs. I looked up and contacted childminders and nannies just in case.
Yesterday morning we arrived at the crèche early and the manager talked to us immediately. It went quite well. She took full responsibility and was not bullshitting at all which I really appreciated. She said that the fact we had written a formal complaint made her job very easy, she'll get back to us with a full report on her investigation by the end of the week and she will fwd our complaint to the main management due to the severe breach in regulations. She assured us that the safety of our child (and all the children in the creche) is absolutely not a matter of personal attitude, that there are rules and her staff has to follow them. If they don't there are consequences. I felt better I have to say and she aslo said she's going to have Jennifer (a senior carer, the one who minded him for the first two days) in the room for a few days and she's planning to move a different carer into the room anyway as she acknowledge the girls lack motherly attitude towards the babies (they are all young girls).
During the day Mike and I called the creche a couple of times to see how things were going and we got always the manager talking to us first and then she would pass us on to Jennifer who was lovely. We were reassured throughout the day that all was well (of course they also said he was getting upset a bit at times which was totally normal to us and made it sound really genuine). When I picked Oliver up he had eaten all his dinner and slept for 1.5 hours in the afternoon (and was alive!!), he had just got up and was getting his nappy changed. You see, I still have this utter fear that Oliver may die in his sleep at the crèche (or anywhere in fact...I know...I'm working on it) and so for me the fact that they say they are checking on the sleeping babies every few minutes really put me at ease. Unless I of course think they are just saying this and in fact they don't do it at all which is what I thought on friday. But my heart melted at the care I saw yesterday. They asked me if I wanted to stay there and give him the bottle given that it was almost time for his feed. Wendy came up to me and showed me his diary and she was lovely (I know she'd been spoken to already by the manager and worried she may be upset with me, but if she was, she didn't show it at all). So again I completely changed my mind and actually thought it was al in my head on friday...Oliver was absolutely happy there watching the children and wanted to get off my lap to sit on the mat and play. I stayed there probably another half hour and the children were all relaxed and playing. Two of them were actually playing peeckaboo with pillows! They were just over 11 months! It was adorable!
Of course I spoke to the manger (who stayed with me all the time in the room) saying maybe I over-reacted and that the girls were in fact lovely. She said that one of them had been with them for 2.5 years, the feedback on her is always fantastic, but that in any case what happen to us on friday was horrible and not to happen again and that we'll still meet on friday and she'd tell me how it all went. There must have been something going on on friday (this is what I think now) and I was there when this first girl had just gone home and a second one was covering (the one who knew nothing about Oliver's day) so I had the impression of neglect while in all probability was just lack of communications between the girls.
Anyway, last night I slept finally and today I am much more relaxed!