Friday, September 7, 2012

Ah the dreams...

Surely this must be yet again another normal thing. Dreaming to bleed and spot one night and dreaming a full on miscarriage a couple of nights later. And oh my God the details are gruesome! I'll spare you my readers.

I remember I had a similar dream when pregnant with Oliver but nothing really happened (I did have one episode of odd spotting at 8 weeks). With this pregnancy, while I am definitely much more zen, the spotting does happen and does bother me. Now I'm tracking it when it happens. It seems to be about once a week, or let me say better, it was a week since it had happened last. Yesterday evening, another tinge in the TP. I'm talking always brown for now and just one streak in the otherwise normal mucus. So I try not to worry, but of course the trips to the loo carry some anxiety. Add the dreams and you have created an obsessive compulsive toilet paper checker.
Again I know very well that I can't do anything one way or another, I'm just willing the time to pass quickly till tuesday for the proper viability scan. Early miscarriages are common of course and very often due to some genetic issue of the embryo, so should this happen I would think it's Nature doing its job. Now...shall I really wish to add yet another drama to our family making? Hell no! But it can still happen and I need to be prepared. Not thinking it will happen, but just ready in case it does.

And you know, I want to end on a good thing, my perky boobs are back! Hello girls! Where have you been? Hopefully we'll be given the all clear for some action, my mood is definitely right!

4 comments:

  1. I was in tears at that Saturday around 6 weeks when spotting happened again. And nothing came of it. I think the advice I got was to drink lots of fluids and put my legs up, take a bit extra rest. Take advantage of the weekend.
    It can be such a powerless thought, that there is nothing we can do to *make* it be alright.. But I'll help you hope! hugs

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  2. Ugh - early pregnancy is the worst! The dreams are a bitch, for sure. And spotting? Shouldn't be allowed for infertiles, for sure! Hope it gets better. Hello girls! Love this!

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  3. OC-TPC. Yup, one needs to get through quite a bit to get to that level. Crap! and those crazy dreams! I hope you may be rid of them soon.
    I don't blame you for building some shields for protection. However, I hope the pressure will soon lift quite a bit after the ultrasound.
    Until then, I will just join and hang out with your hopeful cheerleaders around here! I am excited to hear the newest updates on that tiny embaby;)

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  4. I am thinking good things and hoping for sweet dreams soon. And hoping for solid months and months of drama free pregnancy.

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