Thank you all for the comments, I have felt a bit better lately so hopefully the scary-gray-thoughts will give me some space.
We arrived yesterday in a frosted Dublin. There is snow and ice where we live and although I love looking outthe window, I'd never get out of bed! So this morning we decided to take it easy,I'm sure some colleagues would have been back today, but most won't be in until next week I'd say, so no one would mind me not being in early. We enjoyed our bed no end and cuddled for a while until I got a text from one of my students saying that our building, and in fact the whole of Science was without electricity and not to bother coming in! Oh my...it was just like Christmas! I have been working a bit from home, but mostly done things around the house.
One great news on the attic project is that we got our second quotation and it came in at less than half the price! Plus we know the architect and he lives in our same estate, so we know he knows the development very well. He's also from mainland Europe so I kind of think he'll understand my taste better. Anyway, we obviously checked that his proposal covered the same aspects as the previous one and it does, so I have emailed him this morning to say we woudl like to go ahead with the planning!! That's really exciting.
On the other hand, we still have not heard back from the adoption people. This is very disheartening to say the least. You can't be too nagging of course, but still...it's since October that we know our application has been checked and sits with the Board, it should have been a couple of weeks turn around (still taking nearly 5 months since we lodged our application at the beginning of June) to finally get a waiting list number for our preparation course. Which will still be years away. I am thinking of emailing the kind lady again, I know it' out of her hands now, but maybe she can ask around.
Yesterday, I have started my second week of the pill and a part from a bit of headache is going well, I don't think I have put on weight this time! Only 12 more days anyway!
And meditation is still "hot" in my agenda. The book I got is written by Maneesha James and the website I linked is only one of the many I found. She talks about meditation according to the teaching of Osho (I've only learnt about his existance myself!) and I found it very very calming and empowering. The book has also a CD with a guided meditation known as "Tuning into the Moment" which is amazing too. The only thing I miss now is a little statue of Buddha!