I have undoubtedly become more nervous over the fate of the 5 little heroes. Last night I couldn't really sleep much, and tried to meditate a bit and live in the present rather than imagining the future. I eventually dreamt of babies. Somehow we had two in the house (not our babies though) and I was given one to hold. It was soooooo heavy!! I nearly dropped it! How could I have been so weak? Ah well, I will get stronger.
Today I spent most of the day working. Emails, projects, budgets, reformatting the old computer (still updating since last night...man...no wonder I had to change it) and slowly but surely the crucial hours between 12 and 3pm went by. Then I started thinking maybe they won't go in checking on the embryos until later in the afternoon, so I was a bit on edge until 6pm. They didn't call, at least one is still alive. Tomorrow they will call with news of any kind, I'm trying to think positively and prepare myself emotionally to welcome these little fighter(s). I told you I would have been back in the loop in no time at all. I didn't have a single symptom of OHSS still I will have to go in for a scan on Monday morning. Mike had booked it on the way out from the clinic on Wednesday after ER and I kind of remembered about it only yesterday. I am kind of hoping for some form of confrontation with the nurse. I was also thinking at how I will write a letter of complaint if no embryo survives until transfer. Hopefully I won't have to. Isn't it terrible the kind of tricks the mind plays at night?
On other fronts, given that life goes ahead when we are concentrating on other things, our architect came over on Thursday with the plans for the attic conversion! We loved it! So spacious! We only asked to modify slightly the bathroom so that it'll have a small window and a bigger shower. Next week he's going to send us the updated plan by mail (I'll post the plans then) and he thinks we are ready to submit for planning application to the County Council!! If nothing else happens, at least this is very exciting!
It's also now February, still not a word on the adoption front, this is an utter scandal in my opinion. 8 months have now passed and we still have no idea what our placement on the waiting list is going to be. No reply to my last email a month ago either. Did I tell you? Apparently the same office that deals with adoption requests also deals with the swine flu!! How ridiculous is that? So they can work on adoptions only every other week....some aspects of Ireland are unreal.
13 comments:
Stay strong darlin... just like you have all this while! I am praying for your lil embabies!
I am hanging on as well... counting each day of every week!
I'm glad that no news is good news! I didn't know you were working on adoption as well. We considered it but were told that if we got pregnant during the wait for a placement then we would be removed from the waiting list and the money we spent so far would be lost. So we decided not to try both at the same time. Good luck with tomorrow's phone call!
Why couldn't they at least call you with some kind of update? That doesn't seem right to leave you hanging like that! I don't blame you for thinking yourself into a frenzy, my dear - I hope you get a call first thing in the morning to put you out of your misery.
That's so bizarre about the adoption/swine flu office! An IF couple I know were looking into adoption post-unsuccessful IVF seven years ago and put together a profile book of photos/info on themselves for mothers of infants to look at and choose - they still haven't heard anything back from the agency! Thank goodness they've gone on to have 3 pregnancies since then, resulting in 3 healthy children. Hope the same happens for you guys!
Thinking of your five little heroes at my end!
Love,
Maddy
So glad it's no news, which means it's good news. I hope it is VERY good news. Nights are the absolute pits. All those thoughts running amok. Wouldn't it be nice if we could power down like a computer? Everything crossed for tomorrow. Go heroes, go!
Good thoughts to your five little heros! I know you're going to get an excellent call on Sunday. And I totally get that feeling you had when the clinic called. That feeling of sort of "ok, big deal." It takes so much mental energy to go through IVF and at the point of the call it's like "thanks for letting me know." You don't have much emotion left at this point, so store it up for some big, great news:)
I know that the waiting is pure torture! But I hope this means that all 5 are going strong and tomorrow you'll finally get the report you've been waiting for. If you haven't melted into a puddle by then!
It's good though that the attic conversion is moving along! Sounds fantastic and yes, please, more shower, less window, eh?!
Can you call and ever-so-sweetly bug the adoption people? 8 months seems ridiculous just to find out where you are on the waiting list.
Wishing you lots of luck tomorrow, Fran! Love and hugs.
Hoping for great news for you tomorrow! Grow little embies grow! :-)
I gave you an award on my blog. :-)
This is one time that no news really is good news. I am holding out so much hope for you.
I can't tell you how much I admire your strength and your ability to remain positive when most people would have crumbled. You are so strong and I'm pulling for you this cycle.
I nominated you for an award on my blog...hopefully it gives you a little sunshine today and will allow you to take your mind off of things for a second! Just know that there is a lot of blog love out there for you and many people are praying for your fighters!!
Christina
Hey Fran can't wait to hear your news today. Remember we have to cycle together- we absolutely have to!
Your attic sounds wonderful! Can't wait to see plans too.
But I had to laugh at the same office handling adoption and swine flu, is that a govt office I assume, strange and funny too.
I'm looking forward to seeing your attic conversion plans - sounds exciting!
Hope all 5 are still going strong. Waiting with no news is torture, in my opinion. Wish they'd give you more frequent updates.
I'm glad you didn't get a call. I pray that you have at least a few little guys to transfer. I can't wait to hear what the results are. :)
Keeping fingers crossed for you. Anxiously waiting to see whether there will be embryos to transfer, I've been there. It's difficult, so hang in there.
Adoption and swine flu? Really. That's ... unusual.
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