I have had enough. Since I started this nightmare of IVF last year I gained 6 kilos (13.2 lb for my American friends!). I know, I feel it and I'm certainly not proud of it. in total it's a little over 10% of my weight. Considering that I eat very little it has to be blamed on the hormones. Some days I tell myself "it'll be worth it" but most days I'm saying "is it really worth it?"
My mum passed a few comments while here on holidays on the fact that I have to go for walks (it's fecking bloody melting hot!) or I won't "consume the fat", my sister also noted that I am a bit "swallen". Ok I get it you know? i would like to see you all in my place and see how good you are at keeping your perfect figure. I am conscious of my body, I've always been. i've done sports (all kind) since and actually before I could walk. Lately I've done much less, I got older and obviously there is only so much legacy you can count on. But I don't know how to deal with this now. Nothing I do seem to make a difference, I have to eat while stimming or the follicles won't grow, the pill is just a devil for fluid retention but I only have a few more days to go and it'll be over. I'm absolutely dreading the fact that I'll be on cortisone this time around too. I said to Mike the other night that I won't be taking any more drugs after this cycle. So either we stop altogether or we'll look for a clinic that pays more attention to Nature itself, doesn't put me on the pill just to time me right with their calendar, and possibly considers IVF/ICSI on a natural cycle. I am so low today. We're going to the hills for a few days and back to Dublin on monday, so no internet for a while. I'll miss you all.
3 comments:
Awww. I am so sorry you're feeling down!! As for the comments, they should totally keep them to themselves. I mean really - you've been through a lot and that's the last thing you need. How about a - keep your chin up, you're doing great! That's what I think anyway!! You have done a great job and while I'm sure we could all watch a cookie or two, I say indulge a little. I know I will be. Enough so that I feel comfortable with my body during this important time. You're so right. If the follies aren't happy, nobody will be happy. I encourage you to not worry about that right now. There will come a day when you get back on that wagon - be it after you have the baby or when you adopt - and either way that time isn't far off, in the big scheme of things. The important thing is for you to stay positive and focus on all you have to look forward to. Enjoy your time in Dublin. We'll look forward to hearing from you when you get back! *HUGS*
I hear you on the weight thing. It's definitely the hormones! I'm hoping to make a little dent in my weight while we take this month off.
Are you still on vacation? If so I hope you're enjoying it!
Tell everyone to leave you alone! It's hard enough what you're going through you don't need the criticism! Just enjoy your vacation - the weight will come off when the hormones stop, or keep increasing if you get the news you deserve ;)
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