Saturday, July 25, 2009

No news, good news!

And today went by without a blip. No phone call (from anyone actually!) which means that our little embryos are doing well. Relief. Tomorrow is another day and I'll try and stay positive.
Of course your support is amazing, I can't wait to log on and get my virtual cuddles!

But I am kind of edgy. Mike is annoying me these days, nothing he does or says is right. And I find it impossible to let it go. Today he phoned his sister, I don't know if you remember, but she had three children all with IVF. You would think she's my best friend given that she knows well the hell we are going through. Nope. This type of relationship between brother and sister is one of those were neither of them says much and both seem to mind just their own business. Of course it has nothing similar to the warm relationship I have with my sister and I actually can't understand how it works. They seem to be no more than aquaintances most of the time. So after our first devastating experience where I felt so alone in this mess I could hardly keep my sanity, I was very clear I wouldn't have shared anything else with the in-laws (MIL is no better, she abruptley changed subject once). Maybe I'm exagerating, but I feel that if I get to the point of telling someone (and we are talking family here!) about our journey, the least I expect is a phone call every blue-moon to see how things are going. Given that this never happened I don't think they are interested, so why bother. Anyway, today Mike said to her I had ER on thursday and all going well ET is on tuesday. We got a "Good luck with the transfer" and I think that'll be it for the forseable future.
Also we hadn't said to Mike's side of the family about our adoption project either (not sure how they would take the fact that we are NOT considering Russia OR any other European Country, where children have blue eyes and pale skin, but we are very keen on Vietnam...) but because we need some more medical info from when Mike was a child he had to phone his mum and ask her to go to the local doctor to see if they have kept any record. He must have given too much information as when he was on the phone to his sister, she was very helpful in pointing out that a friend (who has adopted from Russia) said it was a MISTAKE to put too much information in the application, that this will delay things no end. Thanks. Really appreciate it. Already it is a lengthy process, we could do with some support you know? We felt that being totally honest was the way to go and in anycase now is too late to change anything on the application form so why why why does she have to point out that we probably added months to our process? And then Mike wonders why I don't want to stay here at Christmas...

13 comments:

  1. I wish you well with your IVF. Not sure if I agree with your friend's comment about putting too much on the adoption application. I did and it didn't seem to be a problem.

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  2. Here's to hoping this is your month!

    Kellie
    ICLW

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  3. No news IS good news (for the moment) and we can just keep holding our breath and hoping for the best! Meanwhile, about family, I feel your pain. You and I met recently enough that we don't know each other's family (and in-law) issues, but believe me, I try to steer clear of them too! And you know what, I stayed home last Christmas while my DH went to stay with all those looney toon family members of his! Well, try to ignore the noise and stay focued. YOUR children, not theirs. YOUR decisions, not theirs. If all else fails, stick your fingers in your ears and repeat, "La la la la la la la"!

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  4. And by the way, I'm really glad we met too!

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  5. No news is good news!!!

    I don't like sharing info with my ILs either...I don't want/need their advice..and they usually upset me even worse...

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  6. Here from ICLW! I really wish you lots of luck in this cycle! You've been through so much. :( I'm sorry. (((HUGS)))

    Tammy
    ICLW #12

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  7. Sorry about the whole family drama! Yes, no call is definitely the best thing right now! They didn't mention anything about our embies... It seems they were not going to check them out till the 3rd day (or so I was told). I guess the 2ww has already started since my beta will be 2 weeks from ER! These two weeks seem never ending! Praying for your embies to keep growing too! {HUGS}

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  8. So happy for your "no news" post. I agree...no news is good news. As for the family issue, I've found that ambivilance typically comes from those that just don't know what to say. Your SIL, however, does NOT have that excuse. Maybe she's just afraid that getting too involved with your struggle will bring back the pain of hers? Just a thought...

    And I feel your pain about the adoption issue too. My family is the type that would not have understood us wanting a child that didn't look like us. That has to be a tough hurdle to deal with.

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  9. Here from ICLW. Wishing you the best of luck on Tuesday and for the rest of the cycle, of course! I'm sorry that your in-laws don't seem very supportive. It is so helpful to feel those supportive vibes from all of your loved ones. I'm glad you have the internet to bring you some of that, anyway.

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  10. My SIL is pregnant right now through IVF. You'd think she'd ask me once in a while how things are going - but no. I've told my family, and I think they're all afraid to talk about it or something, so I'm not feeling like I'm getting the support I'd like. Oh well.

    Good luck with your transfer this week!

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  11. Sorry about all the family non-involvement, it feels good when you can talk BUT at the same time you dont want them TOO involved but supportive would be nice. And if you guys do adopt, adopt from where you like, they will just have to deal with and if they love your husband, they will love your adoptive child too. Good luck for Monday!

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  12. Yes, I am hoping for a healthy transition between days too! I so wish they had said something about the Embies! Good luck for your call tomorrow and I do truly hope that we both pass the next few weeks with some success! Warm HUGS!

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  13. Best of luck to you as well! I love that you have growing embies...can't wait to hear the next report soon.

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Thank you so much for stopping by, your comments warm my heart!